My Quotes

From WikiPaul - Paul Swanson's wiki

Contents 1 Spring 07 2 Summer 3 Sophomore 4 Lawlor 5 Freshman 5.1 Spring 5.2 Fall

Spring 07

Christi: I like my feet attached

Christi: Size does matter. Feb 27

Christi: I don't want my brother to happen to anyone else.

08:57 < trpik_> "If I were an enzyme i would be DNA helicase so i could unzip your genes."

Christi: So I'm only half a retard?

Drunk Christi: You could always sleep toe-to-foot.

Summer

I have the AIDS of athlete's foot.

Camping fag
Yeah, but I came out

Eating this ice cream is like eating frozen ice cream!

Whoa, I just bit my desk, and now my speakers sound better

There is just something unromantic about fluorescence.

BURP
How did it taste?

She doesn't come cheap. Oh, that sounded bad.

Sophomore

I don't know if I'd say that, you can't use an episode of Mr Ed to point at someone's happy parts

There are a lot of sexual predators on MySpace. However, there are also a lot of sexual prey.

Me: Spread your legs!
Her: It's too big for me!
Later: Oh Paul, you're so good.

Mine is this big!

Holy poop! That's incredibly naughty!

Maybe I've filled up my head with too much music. I have hundreds of CDs up there.

poke poke

one falls out
 

"Holy shit!"

He's just some random guy who stuck his tongue in my mouth.

Oh my god, there's an apple in my hat!

I like being rubbed.

I would totally be a vegetarian if I didn't love meat so much.

Once you write code, never change it.

Lawlor

sandpile dot orgy

The gotos will rise again.

They're not normal zombies.

You'll see more of the dots than you actually care to.

Computers were not automatic. They were often women!

And it never crashes on Tuesdays.

That's a dang bubblesort!

It's a string o' bytes!

You're gunna frickin' put in your name, man!

dude?

boob

Freshman

Spring

Paul, you have a better chance of the internet working than hooking up with [UAF] sorority girls.

No no, that's Paul's poster.

Where the fuck is D?

Your dad's rubber band ball smells like fritos.

You're a good bass player, but not a very good person.

Tap it Paul. Tap that ass.

• Sniff sniff* ... homegrown?

Fux.

Hey guys, we could ejaculate on a biscuit!

Pants!

I'm good at writing not very detailed-ly.

Peril-istic

There are Jews in my house! I need Jew-B-Gon

"I am afraid of black stuff."
"You're a curious little blacksmith!?"

I'm becoming like Eric? BuFuck!

I'll slap you with this flip-flop.

Oh! Oh! ... Oh!

If I could have factored the fucking thing, fuck me *flicks self off*

"Want a chip?"
"No."
"What? I offer you friendship! Kinship! Cornchip!"

Fall

German stoners and fire, that's how the Nazi party started, right?

Top Ramen-Stein

Butt-Bra

I'm going to take a pissssssss-ular event.

Rob, your feet smell like cow shit.

I'm matressing the tester

My love is x as x approaches infinity

"I only appreciate poetry by dead people." "So you don't like your own poetry?" "I'm dead inside."

I love those apostroph-es.

Is there a Slow-The-Fuck-Down setting?

My toes get claustrophobic--- rearowr! *fingers*

Silly Catholic, dicks are for kids.

Rob's giving me funny looks while eating pizza.

Wednsnight

I just punched myself in the pelvis.

"GRAB"

That's Tit-tacular!

I just drank the potatoes, what the fuck?

If you were an Olympic sport, which one would you be?

Ow! Bitch! I dropped deodorant on my toe!

"How fast does the earth spin?" "Once every day"

Fictional friction or frictional fiction? One's an adventurous story, and one's a

"My bicep has twicened in thickness."
"You mean doubled?"
"...No."

It is no longer a love triangle, but a love amoeba

UAF is a giant orgy waiting to happen

Claustrophile- Loves tight spaces

Fiddle Concerto

Syllaballistic

They intended this campus to be for drinking.

When it blinks, it's not good

A lot of work was . . . done

"Are you doing homework?"
"Theoretically."

760 Mickey Mice - computer mice

Be. oh yea? Poof!